Riley needs...

So, I'm taking a break from working on a few freelance projects to have a little fun.

I googled "Riley needs" and these were the first 10 things that came up that made sense. Try it with your name! It's a hoot.

Here's mine...

Riley needs to recruit bigger, faster athletes to hang with the Ducks.
[Ok, cool. I'd like to hang with the Ducks]

Riley needs to fire himself. Again.
[Not in this economy!]

Riley needs a forever home!
[I think I've found that in California]

Riley needs help
[Indeed. Professional.]

Riley has Heterotaxi Syndrome and he needs an Extreme Home Makeover.
[Driver, move that bus!]

Riley needs financial help again.
[If I fire myself again, I will indeed need some financial help.]

Riley needs a friend!!
[Preferably one who enjoys cooking healthy food.]

Riley needs a trampoline.
[...under my balcony. That would be awesome.]

Riley needs to take some posture lessons
[Give me a break. I'm 6'4". I have to duck everywhere!]

Riley needs some fangirling.
[If fangirling leads to a date, then, yes, I need some fangirling.]